You See Into My Soul
by Voldemortsecret
Summary: Thorki AU, Fem!Thor. When Thora, a young peasant girl is about to be whipped in the square for stealing a loaf of bread, a mysterious man intervenes. Lord Loki is known for his cruelty, but something about her captivates him... Rated M for questionable consent.


Thora was the oldest of seven, children birthed in a time when crops were plenty and the rain came on time and often. She had had a happy childhood; through working on the farm before her brothers were old enough she had gained a reputation as a tomboy in her youth, and because food and love was plenty in her home, Thora had not seen the pressure to marry young like some of her friends had. Indeed, at eighteen, Thora was still unmarried, and preferred it that way. But life had grown harsher in the past two years, ever since the droughts and the subsequent famines that struck the village. In consequence, she had been burdened with caring for her six younger siblings as her mother and father now had to work elsewhere for much of the day, trying their hardest to bring in enough money to feed them all. But since her younger brother Bjorn got sick, and her family had to pay the doctor, the family had been in a worse position than before.

That is what led her to to the point of desperation to steal that loaf of bread in the marketplace. She couldn't bear to hear the hungry cries of her siblings anymore, she could not bear to passively stand by and wait for unknown action. Unfortunately, she wasn't as stealthy in her action as she had hoped, and the shop owner had grabbed her wrist, calling for the authorities.

Thora was deeply embarrassed as they led her to the village square, ready to accept the eight lashes that were the customary punishment for her crime. She knelt on the ground, trying to block the gathering crowd from her mind, recognizing the frustrated cry of her father as she shut her eyes, blushing crimson as she realized she had brought humiliation not only to herself, but to her family. And now, everyone knew that even her family had suffered the sting of hunger. She swept her long red blond hair to the side, waiting for the first blow. She could sense the man behind her raise his arm in preparation as she braced herself for the sting of the whip, a sting that never came. Instead, a soft male voice cut through the crowd, commanding silence.

"Stop." Thora looked up in surprise at a hooded figure, a stranger to her, for certain, who had stepped up to intervene. The man exchanged some hushed words with the policeman, and Thora gasped in surprise as the man behind her, paused mid action, lowered his whip, nodding for Thora to stand. She did so hesitantly, eyes fixed on the mystery man as he turned to speak with her father. After a moment of anxious silence, her father met her gaze, his eyes pained, then looked back to the mysterious figure, nodding in resignation as he accepted something from the man. Thora frowned, her eyes narrowing in suspicion. Thoughts of some of her childhood friends, and how they were married off ran through her mind. Surely her father wouldn't… she made up her mind then to get answers, running to her father.

"Father, what happened?" she asked, afraid for the answer. "Why was I not beaten?" Her father lowered his gaze from his daughters eyes then, shaking his head in resignation. "This...this man is your new husband, Thora." His gaze met hers once more and he sighed. "Don't look at me like that, he just spared you. And times are hard, you know that too well. He has offered 14 gold pieces and a goat for your hand. I wouldn't have done this but the children...I did it for the same reason you stole that bread. I had to."

"I would have rather been beaten." She said hollowly, refusing to look at the man who dared call himself her husband. A shadow passed over her fathers face, but he did not respond.

"Come home, say goodbye to your mother and siblings. He will be taking you with him." He said curtly, motioning to the man.

Thora was stoic as she walked home, as she hugged each sibling and said her goodbyes, as she instructed her 15 year old sister, the child closest to her age, to take care of the little ones. Her voice never wavered, and she refused to look at her father, grateful that the man, her husband, had the decency to wait outside. She fell apart completely when left alone with her mother, however, sobbing into the worn women's shoulder.

"Will I ever see you again?" She cried, clinging to her mother like a child, like she was one of those girls sent away to marry at age fifteen, a fate she knew she was sparing her sister from.

"If he is a kind man, I am certain our paths will cross again." Her mother murmured, stroking Thoras hair. "You may be angry with your father now, but at least you will be safe. He is a wealthy man, and you will want for nothing." Thora wiped at her eyes, returning to that stoic look as she pulled away from her mother. She didn't want to want for nothing; she didn't desire all that much. But she knew how much the gold and goat would help her family, and she knew how her absence would mean one less mouth to feed. It had always been a family joke that Thora ate a lot, rivaling her brothers in appetite. She cursed that appetite silently as she nodded to her mother.

"I will make you proud."

The man- Thora still did not know his name- remained silent as he took Thora north on horseback, to a town she had only heard of but never been, located a days ride away. On the way, they stopped for a meal once, and Thora observed that this man (she refused to think of him as her husband, though he introduced her as such) spoke with detachment and authority. He appeared to care for no one, and shunned any attempt made at conversation by others. Thora was silenced when trying to talk to the barman at the tavern, but it was the only time he spoke to her. For much of the ride, he seemed to be deep in thought. Thora was glad he spoke little; she had no desire to speak with him. When he had silenced her in the tavern, she hissed under her breath, but said nothing, not wanting to make a scene when she didn't even know the mans name.

They stopped to water the horses at a stream, Thora still seething from the incident at the tavern. She moved away from him, tossing pebbles into the water while eying an approaching stranger warily. Her husband noticed and grabbed her arm, pulling her behind him as the stranger passed. Thora protested; the stranger seemed harmless enough, but as they mounted their horses and rode off her husband wordlessly pointed out the dagger the man concealed behind his back. A bandit, hoping to steal from a young girl. Thora snorted. She could have taken the bandit with her own dagger, she argued, and the man just laughed and rode on.

Thoras heart leapt as they came upon a castle by the sea just around sunset; as reluctant as she was to leave home, she had always dreamed of living by the sea.

"This is our home." The man said quietly, speaking his first direct words to her since the tavern. "Come." He led Thora into the building, and it was only then when he lowered his hood. "I apologize for being so distant. I am Loki," He said quietly. "The master of this castle, and now, on a whim, I must admit, your husband." Thora looked at Loki nervously. He was very handsome, with long black hair curled to his shoulders, accentuating his pale face, from which his green eyes stood out with a captivating shine. But his expression was not kind. And though his eyes were handsome, they were cold. Lok looked at her expectantly, waiting for her to speak.

"My name is Thora." She said confidently, masking the fear in her heart. Loki nodded, smiling, though there was no tenderness in it, Thora noted. She missed the love and tenderness of her home, her family. There was none of that here. Loki cupped Thoras cheek in his hand gently, wiping away a tear that had gotten through her defences with his thumb. The softness of his touch surprised her.

"You are quite beautiful, little one." Loki murmured. His hand moving to touch her red gold hair. "We shall make a fine couple." He nodded, his hand falling. "Come, let us have dinner."

Thora was introduced to several servants at dinner, but was silenced when she tried to speak with them. Loki did not like her conversing with others. Just as on the ride there, he was very possessive. She frowned; how could she enjoy her new life if she had no friends? It would be captivity to be denied any human interaction besides her husband; he had to see that. After dinner, he wasted no time in taking her arm, leading her upstairs, away from others.

"This is our tower, pet." He said in that same soft tone. Thora could tell he was trying his hardest to be gentle, but she saw through his voice and noted the coldness in his eyes. Loki took her hand, frowned, then reached in a nearby box and produced a smaller box, and within that, a ring. "This shall be yours, pet." He murmured, slipping it on her finger. "It suits you well. I apologize that our wedding was not a grand event. I shall make it up to you." He sounded so genuine, so loving and kind, that Thora almost believed him, if it were not for the coldness in his eyes.

"You are a skilled liar. Will you lie to me often?" She observed boldly, looking down at the ornate ring on her finger. Loki tensed for a moment, and then relaxed.

"And you are a headstrong little pet." He said darkly, his illusion of kindness finally broken. "You will know your place." Thora had always been a fighter, so she, perhaps unwisely, challenged him.

"My place is not as a submissive little girl." She hissed, narrowing her eyes. "I had always assumed that when I married, I would marry as an equal, not as a plaything." Lokis face darkened as he grabbed her arm roughly, jerking her towards him. Thora effortlessly pulled out of his grasp and Loki smirked.

"Perhaps we should let this rest, hmm?" He asked idly, leaning in towards her ear "You should quit while you are ahead, little one." He whispered, causing Thora to shrink back. "I thought so." He laughed, looking her over. "If you obey me, I shall show you kindness, pet. I shall be a gentle, soft spoken husband. If you do not, well…" He tilted his head, and Thora saw the ice in his eyes, while her eyes were on fire. She resented this man, but was too tired to argue any longer.

"I understand." She whispered, lowering her head.

"Now that's better." Loki observed, lifting her chin so her eyes met his. "You shall not regret your decision, little one." He leaned in and kissed her then, catching Thora by surprise. His kiss was gentle, but hungry, and she pulled away. "Did I startle you?" He asked, mock concern in his voice. "I apologize." His lips met hers again, deeper this time.

Thora tried to pull away but he followed her, tripping her backwards and guiding her fall so she was lying back on the bed, all the while kissing her intently. His hands wandered away from her wrists, beginning to undo the laces of her dress. Thora squirmed from his grip, trying to push him away. Loki raised an eyebrow, grabbing her wrist. "This is not obedience I am seeing, pet. You are my wife." He pulled her forward, his lips meeting hers, as he carried on with his actions. Thora freed her hand easily and pushed him away, trying once again to back out of his grip, her eyes flashing. Lokis eyes narrowed as he grabbed her wrists and pinned her hands over her head. "You should take care to remember what I told you." He hissed, any attempt at kindness gone. "Do you want a gentle husband? then you should relent to me."

His breath was hot on her face and she flinched as he shook her, not too hard but with the threat of more. Thora thought a moment and then relaxed her struggle against his hold, deciding it would be better to relent. She was not a virgin, not after her midsummer affair with Steven, the blacksmiths apprentice, so at least he could not take that from her. She almost laughed as she remembered Steven, and how the affair was broken off because he wanted to marry her, and she, at seventeen was still too wild, too free to be tied down, though Steven had loved her. If only she had married Steven, she thought idly. She hadn't loved him as he did her, but he was kind, and she could have grown to love him, and she certainly would not be in this position now if she had married Steven.

Loki released her wrists cautiously, smiling when she put up no resistance. "You're learning, pet." He murmured, suddenly soft spoken once more. She was surprised at the gentleness of his kisses, his caresses, and she soon came to the realization that he was a very skilled and talented lover. His lips grazed her neck, trailing down her body and marking her in ways she had never imagined, and she hated herself as she responded favorably to his touch. She couldn't contain the moan that escaped her lips as he filled her, claiming her as his. Under different circumstances, she mused, the night would have been perfect. Under these, however, it was mildly tolerable. She did not love him, no, she hated him. He tore her from her family and kept her like a pet to use for his own pleasure, and though he tried to be kind, she knew his kindness was all lies, all tricks to get her to submit to him.

Thora was genuinely surprised when Loki pulled her in his arms afterwards. She hadn't expected him to do so, and she said nothing as he fell asleep quickly. He was so handsome in his sleep, so soft looking, such a contrast to his waking demeanor. He said he had married her on a whim. Why had he done that?

When Thora woke she was still in Lokis arms, her head against his chest. He was alread mildly awake, threading his fingers through her hair softly. She feigned sleep for a few minutes more, then dared to move slightly, as though she was stirring awake. Loki undid his fingers from her hair, fixing his gaze at her as he kissed her temple lightly.

"Sleep well?" Thora looked at him darkly in response. Loki raised an eyebrow and sighed, trailing light kisses over her shoulder before propping himself up on his elbows, considering her.

"Are you unhappy here?" He sat up, leaning against the headboard, pulling her with him. "I am able to give you anything, my beautiful wife. Anything you wish, it shall be yours." He whispered, trailing his fingers against her skin in a caress. It was a pleasing sensation, and Thora felt as though he truly cared about her, though she knew he couldn't possibly.

"I wish to be with my family again." She whispered, avoiding his eyes and the coldness she knew they held. If she didn't look at them, she could at least pretend his affections were genuine. She felt Loki tense at her words, and she tensed in response, half expecting a violent reaction.

"I cannot give you that." Thora nodded stiffly, not answering. She had nothing to say to him. "You will be happy here, pet." Lokis voice returned to the soft tone he adopted when trying to win her over. "You will see."

Over time, Loki indeed gave Thora many things. Her closet was filled with elaborate dresses, her shelf filled with ornate jewels for her hair, and once he discovered her love for books, he allowed her to spend much of her day in the library. But none of that mattered. Thora tried to avoid Loki during the day, but he was everywhere it seemed; watching her, checking up on her, always touching her, guarding her. One could argue that was his way of caring, but his eyes were so cold, and Thora knew the truth. She was a toy. His possessiveness had become a problem, as she found it difficult to make friends, and she was desperate for human contact that was not Loki. She had managed to befriend a few servants, as well as become acquaintances with a few officials who frequented the castle, but she had to hide this from Loki, who wanted all her attention to himself. It was as though he sensed when she was giving attention to others, and her isolation irritated her. Not to mention her pent up energy. She had never been a demure lady; she wanted to ride horses and spend time doing things, like she had done at home. As a result, she became incredibly lonely and tired most of the time, as she was unwilling to talk to Loki. He didn't seem to mind that she was so quiet. As long as he kept her close and had her when he pleased, she thought bitterly.

She had observed him over the weeks and and heard enough gossip to know what kind of ruler he was over his castles lands and people. They feared him, the people, the servants, the noblemen. Loki was known to kill those who displeased him without a second thought, and Thora was disappointed at his cruelty. And why save her, then, if punishment was what he believed in? Merely because she was beautiful and wished to win her favor? Loki had numerous willing women around right here, that Thora noticed right away. Before his marriage, Loki had apparently been quite the man of many partners, and Thora wondered if she was the only one he was having. But he returned to her each night, and checked on her so often during the day, that she couldn't see how he would have the time.

A few months since she came to the castle, and Thora sat curled on a couch in the library, absorbed in her book until she heard shouting from outside the window. Curious, she set aside her book and leaned out the open window, smiling at the sight of two of her closest servant acquaintances, Davy, a kitchen boy a few years younger than her, and Esmeralda, his mother, whose job was to look after Thora in Lokis absence. Esmeralda was the only servant Thora was allowed to speak with, and seeing her was what got Thora through most days. She called down to them, excited to see familiar faces, and they grinned, waving up to her, standing beneath her window. All too soon, Davy began to make hurried signs with his hand, pointing towards a door. It was then she heard them, Lokis footsteps. She slammed the window shut and collapsed on the couch, feigning sleep.

"Ahh." Loki murmured as he saw her. "There she is." Thora wished he would leave, and frowned beneath her hair as she felt his weight settle as he took a seat beside her head. She made a soft sleep noise and curled into a ball, hoping to be convincing enough. She heard a slight chuckle from Loki, and bit her tongue when she felt Lokis hand stroke her hair. "I should leave you be." Lokis voice cut the silence, barely audible to her. "Thora." He whispered her name. "I do not understand you. You only accept my touch in your sleep. You willingly curl into me then, you cling to me, my shirt. If I could only figure out how to get you to do so in your waking hours. Perhaps overbearing was not how I should have acted. But it is too late now." Thora suppressed a gasp at his words. She did that? She often awoke in his arms, holding him as much as he held her, but she had always assumed he had pulled her sleeping form into that position. To hear him tell it now, she sought him out! Loki pressed his lips to her forehead softly, sighed, and then stood. Thora heard his departing footsteps, yet did not move for some time, her thoughts on what Loki had said.

Thoras position of silence in the corners of the castle allowed her an advantage the following day, in the library. Two servants were whispering to one another, under the impression they were alone.

"Are you sure?"

"He can help us. All we have to do is get Loki out of the way. He'll be here in two weeks."

"Who?" The second servant lowered his voice before answering.

"Thomas DeVille. He's been after Lokis families fortune for years. He'd be a better lord than Loki. All we have to do is poison Loki. Deville will give us the poison. We can put it in his wine."

"But.."

"No more questions. Come, we're expected downstairs." Thora froze. They were going

to poison Loki. A jolt of fear shot through her, until she realized, she could be free.

That night, Loki looked down at Thoras sleeping form in his arms. She, like most nights that he didn't take her, had fallen asleep on the other side of the bed, and had made her way to him in the night. He did not understand it. Her body twitched, and he realized she was dreaming. He frowned as she made a soft noise of fear, and pulled away from an invisible attacker. He made to wake her, when his own name came from her lips.

"Loki...no…" She murmured, burying her face in his chest. "please go...leave me alone!"

Loki gasped as he listened, realizing she was dreaming of her first night in the castle. He swore, pulling her up into his arms.

"Shh, pet." He whispered, smoothing her hair. "I shall let you alone. I will never make you feel unsafe again, I promise, little one."

Thoras eyes flew open, staring directly into Lokis, and she cried out, for a moment thinking her nightmare had become real. Then, she realized the cold in his eyes, it was no longer there. His green eyes were beautiful…

"Loki…" She murmured sleepily. "Your eyes, they are so beautiful like that."

"Like what?" He asked, bewildered, thinking she must still be sleeping.

"Like how they look when they care for me." She murmured, burying her face in his shoulder and falling back into a dreamless sleep. Loki looked down at her, astonished, not entirely sure what she meant.

Neither Loki or Thora spoke of that night, but Loki refrained from taking her in the time following. He decided he would no longer do so unless he was certain she was willing. Thora seemed surprised, but did not press the matter. Over that week, Thora noticed the ice in Lokis eyes melted, just a bit, when he looked at her. She wondered if he had ever known kindness before, and resolved to show him as much kindness as she could.

It was late one night, a little over a week after Thoras nightmare, when she saw a side of Loki she didn't think existed.

She had woken up to movement and noise, and realized Loki was the one having the nightmare that night. She propped herself up on her elbow beside him, watching for a moment as he thrashed in his sleep, murmuring words she could barely make out. What could he possibly be dreaming about? It seemed he was crying out in pain, begging someone to stop. Thora curled up beside him, cupping his face in her hands.

"Loki." She said, concerned, ignoring his cold sweat, trying to wake him. "Loki!" He jerked from her grip, then, sitting up, prepared to attack. He relaxed a bit under Thoras gaze, though he was still shaking.

"Thora." he choked, panting, gasping her like a drowning man. She pulled his head to her chest, stroking his hair. She was shocked to discover he was still trembling.

"Loki…" she whispered, unsure how to ask.. "Does this happen often?"

"Yes." he relented, clinging to her. Thora understood he still had not entirely regained himself, and held him tighter.

"They're only dreams." She murmured, looking upon him with concern. Loki shook his head.

"They're memories." Loki said nothing for some time, and Thora thought he had fallen asleep. When he spoke next, however, he sounded wide awake, and much more himself. "Your nightmare was a memory." Thora sighed; she had hoped he had forgotten that.

"Yes." She said darkly.

"It was my fault. I caused your pain." His voice was stoic as he pulled from her grasp and took her in his arms, cradling her against his chest now.

"Who caused yours?" She whispered. Loki said nothing for a time.

"I do not wish to speak of it tonight. You will learn in time."

When Thora woke the next morning, Loki was gone, but there was a vase of flowers on the nightstand for her and a note saying he would be back by that evening. Thora spent the day with Davy and Esmerelda; though they were servants, they were her only friends.

That night upon Lokis return, he greeted her with a gentle kiss and took her hand. Thora couldn't help but gasp at this display of affection. When he looked at her, his eyes were, for the first time, warm. It was then, in the entryway, her hand in Lokis grasp, when Thora thought of the plot she had heard a while ago. It was almost time for the banquet Loki was planning, the banquet Thomas DeVille would be attending.

Thora was torn. Loki had finally begun to show her genuine kindness, but...she longed to see her family. Perhaps the plan was cancelled, and she would not have to do anything. Thora thought of the servants, and resolved to seek out Davy, as he worked in the kitchens.

Though she tried after dinner to make an excuse to slip away for a while, Loki was not having it. Instead, he took her to their tower, leaning in, and pressing his forehead to hers before wordlessly revealing to her a bracelet he had gotten for her, engraved with the words You see into my soul.

"Please forgive me, my pet." Loki whispered, his fingertips tracing the bracelet on her wrist. His gaze was pleading, his eyes genuine. Thora looked into those warm green eyes and realized she was mirroring his gaze of adoration. She was falling in love with him. There was no way she could not save him.

"I haven't heard anything, ma'am." Davy whispered when Thora confronted him out back peeling potatoes the next morning.

"Since when have you called me ma'am?"

"I'm sorry, I'm nervous, because, well you're my friend, and I want you to be happy, and if your husband is murdered you won't be all that happy even though I thought you hated him but everyone is so afraid of him that wouldn't it be better if, well, he got sick and, um…" Thora grabbed the collar of Davys shirt and slammed him against the wall. He yelped in surprise. "My lady!"

"Stuff it." Thora snapped. "My best friends were all male. I can and will beat your face in. What do you know." Davey paled.

"Tonight, they're going to poison his wine." Thora let go of Davey then, nodding.

"Thank you. You won't get in trouble, I promise. You are my friend."

Though she searched the castle for Loki, she could not find him and was informed he would not be back until dinner. Thora prepared for the banquet alone, hoping he would come home early, but it did not happen. She met Loki in the entryway, and he looked so handsome and so fine she actually blushed when he took her hand. He kissed her cheek then, and whispered in her ear "I missed you, love." He pulled away before she could respond, so she simply nodded. Drinking in his smile.

She sat beside him at the head of the table, feeling sick to her stomach as dinner was served. She saw a servant, one from the library, she realized with a bitter taste in her mouth, place a goblet of wine before Loki. She tapped his wrist, trying to get him to lean in, but he simply kissed her lips and smiled before re-engaging himself in his dinner table debate with another nobleman. Thora frowned, annoyed by his dismissal, no matter how sweet his lips tasted. She saw him reach for his goblet and lunged forward suddenly, knocking it to the floor.

"Thora!" Loki exclaimed, pushing his chair backwards, shooing one of his dogs, which had begun lapping up the spilled wine. "What have you done? That was clearly deliberate!"

"It was poisoned!" She exclaimed, not caring who heard. "I heard some servants talking about it earlier and I never had a chance to say anything, I tried to get your attention, but.."

"Poisoned?" Loki asked quietly. "No, it couldn't be…"

"Sire! The dog!" Loki turned and saw the dog who had been lapping at the wine, laying on its side on the hall floor, breathing heavily. Loki looked down at his goblet in horror as guards ran to pull the servants from the kitchen. The more skeptical of the two men broke down and confessed the minute they were brought out, hastily pointing to the other man and Thomas DeVille as the ones who dragged him into the plot.

"Thora…" Loki whispered as the guards took the would-be-assassins away. "You saved my life."

"I know." She said her gaze meeting his. "But please don't praise me just yet. I knew for longer than you think."

"What made you hold your tongue?" Loki murmured, cupping her face in his hands.

"I was unhappy here. Loki, I have no friends, save Davy and Esmerelda, and most likely not Davy, because I threatened to beat him up, but anyway...you were not kind, and I hated you for a time. I did not know you could be kind until recently. I wanted to give you a second chance, because I prefer to see the best in people. Forgive me for not speaking up sooner."

"You almost beat up a servant?" Loki asked, bewildered. "How unladylike." He laughed, pulling Thora closer to him. "So perfect. I could not ask for better. Oh, love, do not ask for forgiveness. It is I who should be asking for forgiveness. You have taught me so much, and I have underestimated you." He leaned in, kissing Thora deeply, smiling into her skin as she returned it with the same intensity.

"Perhaps we should call it an early night, love?" Loki asked, nodding towards the tower conspiratorially. Thora laughed, wrapping her arms around Loki, laughing as he lifted her into his arms.

"I thought you would never ask."


End file.
